Thankfulness

I've been doing a thankfulness/gratitude journal with my gal Emily for several months now. We started it as a one month challenge to start reconnecting with God, but then just kept on doing it as a way to stay connected to each other when I left Chicago. I'll be honest...I more often than not forget to do it and have to make up several days at a time...but I know that I feel so much better when I'm regularly expressing gratitude and thankfulness.

I read a couple different devotionals each morning, one of them being Jesus Calling. I love how it's written from Jesus' perspective...like He's talking to me each day.  Today's was exactly what I needed to get back into doing the gratitude journal with Em after a week or so sabbatical...

Bring ME the sacrifice of thanksgiving. Take nothing for granted, not even the rising of the sun. Before Satan tempted Eve in the Garden of Eden, thankfulness was as natural as breathing. Satan's temptation involved pointing Eve to the one thing that was forbidden her. The Garden was filled with luscious, desirable fruits, but Eve focused on the one fruit she couldn't have rather than being thankful for the many good things freely available. This negative focus darkened her mind, and she succumbed to temptation. 

When you Focus on what you don't have or on situations that displease you, your mind also becomes darkened. You take for granted life, salvation, sunshine, flowers, and countless other gifts from Me. You look for what is wrong and refuse to enjoy life until that is "fixed." 

 When you approach Me with thanksgiving, the Light of My Presence pours into you, transforming you through and through. Walk in the Light with Me by practicing the discipline of thanksgiving.

Isn't that so the way it is? When you stop thanking God for what you have, what He's given you, you start thinking that you deserve so much more and usually set out to get it on your own. Well, let me tell you...that never brings happiness, joy or contentment. Going it alone, and leaving God behind is a sure fire way to end up miserably unhappy.

Today, I choose joy and thankfulness. I don't have everything I want but I know God has provided me with everything I need, and for that, I'm truly grateful.

In The News

There's been a lot in the news lately about Indiana's Religious Freedom Act. I'm not going to even pretend I'm educated about the language of the law or the intention behind it. What I want to address is what I see happening in the media, and on social media.

Here's my take:

People are mad because it seems this law allows business owners to discriminate based on sexual orientation or identity.

Other people think that if someone's way of life or beliefs are in direct opposition to their own, then they should not have to do business with those people.

From what I can tell, it's the politically conservative crowd that makes up this second group. It also seems it's safe to say that the majority of that group also identifies as Christian. And because they are "christians" they consider anything other than strict heterosexuality to be sinful and feel that doing business with anyone who doesn't easily and obviously fall into this category would be condoning sin.

I'd like to challenge this idea for one moment:

If you consider yourself a Christian that would mean you follow Christ. And by follow, I mean emulate, seek to be like, look up to, live by His teachings, believe His words and actions as undeniable truth.

The Jesus I know did not only associate with people who looked just like him, lived just like him, who believed exactly what he believed. He didn't turn away those who were living life differently than most. He never worried that fraternizing with sinners would tarnish Him or bring Him down in anyway.


In fact, He sought out those who society had cast aside as different. He used those opportunities to shine His Light into the darkness. 

John 4 English Standard Version (ESV)

Jesus and the Woman of Samaria

4 Now when Jesus learned that the Pharisees had heard that Jesus was making andbaptizing more disciples than John ² (although Jesus himself did not baptize, but only his disciples), ³ he left Judea and departed again for Galilee. ⁴ And he had to pass through Samaria. ⁵ So he came to a town of Samaria called Sychar, near the field that Jacob had given to his son Joseph. ⁶ Jacob's well was there; so Jesus, wearied as he was from his journey, was sitting beside the well. It was about the sixth hour.^[a]

⁷ A woman from Samaria came to draw water. Jesus said to her, “Give me a drink.” ⁸ (For his disciples had gone away into the city to buy food.) ⁹ The Samaritan woman said to him, “How is it that you, a Jew, ask for a drink from me, a woman of Samaria?” (For Jews have no dealings with Samaritans.) ¹⁰ Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God, and who it is that is saying to you, ‘Give me a drink,’ you would have asked him, and he would have given you living water.” ¹¹ The woman said to him, “Sir, you have nothing to draw water with, and the well is deep. Where do you get that living water? ¹² Are you greater than our father Jacob? He gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did his sons and his livestock.” ¹³ Jesus said to her, “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again,¹⁴ but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again.^[b] The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”¹⁵ The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water, so that I will not be thirsty or have to come here to draw water.”

¹⁶ Jesus said to her, “Go, call your husband, and come here.” ¹⁷ The woman answered him, “I have no husband.” Jesus said to her, “You are right in saying, ‘I have no husband’;¹⁸ for you have had five husbands, and the one you now have is not your husband. What you have said is true.” ¹⁹ The woman said to him, “Sir, I perceive that you are a prophet.²⁰ Our fathers worshiped on this mountain, but you say that in Jerusalem is the place where people ought to worship.” ²¹ Jesus said to her, “Woman, believe me, the hour is coming when neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem will you worship the Father. ²² You worship what you do not know; we worship what we know, for salvation is from the Jews.²³ But the hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father is seeking such people to worship him. ²⁴ God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth.” ²⁵ The woman said to him, “I know that Messiah is coming (he who is called Christ). When he comes, he will tell us all things.” ²⁶ Jesus said to her, “I who speak to you am he.”

John 7:53-8:11English Standard Version (ESV)

[The earliest manuscripts do not include 7:53–8:11.]^[a]

The Woman Caught in Adultery

⁵³ [[They went each to his own house, but Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. ² Early in the morning he came again to the temple. All the people came to him, and he sat down and taught them. ³ The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery, and placing her in the midst ⁴ they said to him, “Teacher, this woman has been caught in the act of adultery. ⁵ Now in the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?” ⁶ This they said to test him, that they might have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground.⁷ And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.” ⁸ And once more he bent down and wrote on the ground. ⁹ But when they heard it, they went away one by one, beginning with the older ones, and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him. ¹⁰ Jesus stood up and said to her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” ¹¹ She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more.”]] 

As Christians, we were not called to huddle together with our backs to the world in an attempt to never come into contact with those who are different from us. We were called to go make disciples of the nations. To live in the world, which is full of a variety of different people with different ideas about how to live, who to love, where to place their faith. To show Christ's LOVE to those who have never experienced it. To shine His light into the dark places of our world. 

What if Jesus never interacted with people who thought differently than Him? We wouldn't have half the New Testament, I can tell you that much. Saul was KILLING Christians. Jesus could have said, "oh, he's so different from me, he's a sinner. I can't be around sinners because I'm perfect. I'll just leave him alone. (or maybe he would have asked God to strike Saul down) He's a lost cause, I can't waste my time on him" BUT, instead, Jesus spoke directly to him, showing him Truth and giving him Life. And this wasn't a one-time deal...

Luke 7:36-50English Standard Version (ESV)

A Sinful Woman Forgiven

³⁶ One of the Pharisees asked him to eat with him, and he went into the Pharisee's house and reclined at the table. ³⁷ And behold, a woman of the city, who was a sinner, when she learned that he was reclining at table in the Pharisee's house, brought an alabaster flask of ointment, ³⁸ and standing behind him at his feet, weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears and wiped them with the hair of her head and kissed his feet and anointed them with the ointment. ³⁹ Now when the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, “If this man were a prophet, he would have known who and what sort of woman this is who is touching him, for she is a sinner.” ⁴⁰ And Jesus answering said to him,“Simon, I have something to say to you.” And he answered, “Say it, Teacher.”

⁴¹ “A certain moneylender had two debtors. One owed five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. ⁴² When they could not pay, he cancelled the debt of both. Now which of them will love him more?” ⁴³ Simon answered, “The one, I suppose, for whom he cancelled the larger debt.” And he said to him, “You have judged rightly.” ⁴⁴ Then turning toward the woman he said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair.⁴⁵ You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet.⁴⁶ You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment.⁴⁷ Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.” ⁴⁸ And he said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.” ⁴⁹ Then those who were at table with him began to say among themselves, “Who is this, who even forgives sins?” ⁵⁰ And he said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.”

Why do we use Jesus' name to hurt others? Never, as Christians, should we discriminate, for any reason, because Jesus didn't discriminate when He died for us on the cross. He died for EVERYONE. Jews and Gentiles. All genders, colors and sizes.

for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God          Romans 3:23

Jesus didn't die so we could tell people there's something wrong with them or they aren't good enough to do business with us. He didn't die so we could be mean or hurtful. He made the ultimate sacrifice and asked us to show that same love, grace and mercy to others. Our job is to love others as Christ loves us. I guarantee you Jesus would take every opportunity to shine light into anyone's life. He wouldn't turn away anyone. For any reason. And neither should we. 

The Ultimate Sacrifice

I never understood why the day Christ died was called GOOD Friday. Seems like a terrible day to me.

And it is. But then Sunday comes and we realize all the Good that was done for us on Friday.

He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed.  1 Peter 2:24

Yeah...I'd call that Good.

Good Friday services are my favorite of the entire year. It's the day where the weight of what He endured for us is fully realized.

This verse of "In Christ Alone" always just levels me:

In Christ alone, Who took on flesh,
Fullness of God in helpless babe!
This gift of love and righteousness,
Scorned by the ones He came to save.
Till on that cross as Jesus died,
The wrath of God was satisfied;
For ev'ry sin on Him was laid—
Here in the death of Christ I live.

Here are a few other songs that help me to focus on Christ's Work on the cross. To remind myself of the need I have for Him. That without Him, I am lost. But because of Him, I have eternal life with my Heavenly Father.

The Light Has Overcome

This is part 2 of my story...for part 1 please click here

In the weeks and months that passed after learning of the miscarriage, I fell into a pit of depression. I had lost my father only 2.5 years prior and struggled to see light in the world. Everywhere I looked, everything I saw looked dark. How was I going to go through the rest of my life with the heavy weight of despair riding on my shoulders and in my heart?

I remember being by the lake one day and thinking that there had to be more. There had to be a bigger reason for me than just to do whatever I wanted. If I was only alive for making myself happy, well...that just wasn't enough. I needed more. I wanted more. My heart cried out for more and my weary soul knew I was made for more. 

I want to be clear...suicide was never something that crossed my mind. Depression can lead to suicidal thoughts but that's not what was happening here. I never wanted to die... the opposite actually...my soul was screaming to me that it wanted to LIVE. 

One day, about 9 months after the miscarriage I had a Sunday morning off work and decided to go to church with boyfriend, who regularly attended. I knew I needed to check out this "Jesus thing" once and for all so I could finally make a decision about whether it all was just a bunch of crap (which is what I thought I'd determine) or if He really is the Savior of the world. Over the next few months I continued to attend church and sought out guidance from one of the girls I worked with (who is now my bestie). 

I found the Bible to be the Word of God. Jesus to be the Spotless Savior He claimed to be. God became my loving father instead of the wicked puppet-master I'd previously pictured Him to be. But the hurt, sadness and anger I felt about the miscarriage persisted. They say time heals all wounds. I find that to be a total lie. Time doesn't heal all wounds, you just become more accustomed to living with an open wound. 

Boyfriend became fiancé and then we eventually broke up. I moved across the country and started a new life in Chicago with two of my best friends. I dove into my newfound faith and was baptized in lake Michigan at the end of July 2008. But the pain persisted. It took years (until about 2011) for me to see the good that came out of that terrible experience. As I sat in a hotel room in Uganda sharing my story with a girl I'd just met the day before, I realized that though I'll always feel the loss of my baby and my desire to be a mother only grows as time passes, God used the miscarriage for good.

I believe that bad things happen to good people but though God allows them, that doesn't mean He causes them. Take Job for instance...God allowed Satan to mess with Job to prove his faith but it wasn't God doing the terrible things. Bad things happen because we live in a fallen world (thanks Adam and Eve...) but God will use ALL things for His good if we just get out if His way a minute.

Now, sitting here, 10 years later, I see how much God has worked in and through me. I miss my daughter every single day (I'm convinced my baby would have been a girl) but because of the miscarriage I've experienced some things I never would have been able to had I not...

• I came to Christ because of my grief and sadness
• God has given me not one, but THREE Ugandan daughters and I wouldn't give them up for all the world.
• God has taken me to Uganda twice and Haiti once, I know this wouldn't have happened if I had a baby at home
• I've been able to be there for other women who have miscarried in a way only someone who has gone through the experience could be. When I walked in to be with one of my friends I knew that God had prepared me "for such a time as this"
• I've moved around, changed jobs, traveled, all without having to worry about how it would affect anyone else...God has opened doors I've been able to walk thrbecause I'm only responsible for myself

It took a long time but finally the scales tipped...the sadness and loss will always be with me but the Good that has come because of this has overcome...the LIGHT has shutout the darkness.